"The unexamined life is not worth living." - Plato

"The unlived life is not worth examining." - Mr. Collins

"I am the Way, the Truth, and the Life." - Jesus Christ


It is so odd how things work out. I've been musing and pondering much of late on what it is I want more than anything. For many, perhaps even most, the answer to this is simple, they want to be happy. I don't. Now don't get me wrong, I do not want to be unhappy, but that is simply not the most important thing for me. What I want more than anything is to live. Just that. The real question comes when you ask what it means to live. At first it seemed as though living were seeing and doing and experiencing with a passion (which of course leads to more discussion.) But that left something lacking, it was not enough. With that definition you are lead to (or left with) a hedonistic approach to everything. No living - truly living - consists of finding truth, the Truth. And not just finding it, but seeing it, knowing it, making it part of who and what you are in your deepest self, until you are no longer, but only Truth. And this causes pain. Because in this life that is simply not possible. We can come close, so close but we can never fully die to ourselves before the body dies so that total union is never achieved in this life.
Now the odd part of it all is that though I've been pondering and considering all of this for the last two year (or more) it didn't all come together in something resembling coherence until last night after watching Garden State (very good movie, the cinematography is amazing and the plot line is nearly as good) after meeting and hanging out for hours with a group of local poets. At one point in the movie Sam says to Andrew " I know it hurts. But it's life, and it's real. And sometimes it fucking hurts, but it's life, and it's pretty much all we got." It's life and it's real, truth is a reflection of reality and reality of the Truth. And He is pretty much all we got.